unfurling...

its the most beautiful thing i have felt in months... you know, aside from that one, glorious story on that one magical night... ever since deciding. really actually honestly deciding, i feel myself alive. my fingers are no longer numb and my legs itch to stretch and jump as though they have been healed of some bed ridden disease. i feel hope like its choking me in wonder. how can i complain? its like falling into a meadow where you only thought terror exists. i feel like i'm coming back, and there is no way to stop the momentum. i cried out and was heard. i waited and waited and waited, and the Lord heard my cry. and not only that, but gave me a NEW SONG. and its brilliant. and now, i feel like dancing--something i haven't been able to really do for over a year. i can sing again with freedom of heart. i can laugh and feel my eyes sparkle of joy. this transformation is brilliant. i was so heavy and so dark, and then it came time for this surprising unfurling. oh, may there be more and more and more and more and more of this newness within my soul...