a stirring.

so i've completely forgotten about blogging. i haven't been reading OR writing. perhaps this is weird to say, but my "muse" is back. i'm looking around and finding things worth sharing. i'm feeling things in my heart that are not able to keep silent. so here i am. back to the steady pluck of these keys.

life is weird. how we choose to live it. will we desire wealth and fame? a beautiful spouse? a worthwhile job (and at whose definition??) or will we desire to live as wanderers. i met a man yesterday. he's homeless and rolling through wherever he goes, experiencing the Lord as he goes. he dives into his word and grows with his savior because he isn't living the rat race. he tries not to let the pressures of america defeat his soul like the rest... i was encouraged in our conversation. i also felt a sense of jealousy. it hit me so quickly that i was confused. i became jealous of his freedom and his hope in the one that saved him. he wasn't bound by worldly things (as i have become). he isn't a slave to selfish ambitions or vain conceit. in our talk, the Word came more alive to me and began to wave like a long lost friend across an open field. will i run to hug him? or saunter showing my disbelief? doesn't the second sound so silly when you can call out and reunite?

i am not sure of what i am afraid of. but it has become clear that i am. i'm growing, breaking, and being stirred and its a good place to be. Adam reminded me of that... and i will continue to pray for these new friends of mine.